Lets talk about emotion….

So i have only recently gotten my diagnosis of bi-polar disorder just last year. I was always just been told I was a manic-depressive lol but this explains a lot. After studying psychology in college I realized I was more bi-polar than anything. I have the manic stages and the deep dark hole of depression. I can be a happy ray of sun shine one minute and in a crying yelling fit the next. The prescription medication I was put on would either put me in a fog where I was just going about my day not happy yet not sad or it would have crazy side effects one would not let me sleep another would put me to sleep.


I was recommended cannabis not for my bi-polar disorder but for my chronic back pain (that will be a whole other post). I’ve been off psych meds for a couple years now just trying to deal with the mood swings by myself. Let me just say that it WAS NOT working and a lot of stress and anguish was put on my family for me and I am so thankful that I had a strong man by myside who could hold the fort down for me.

When I am having one of my mood swings I become a mean person. I snap, yell, cry and punch walls or my leg. Then when it is all done I feel like shit which spirals me down again. Its like vicious cycle that will continue until something breaks it.

The only thing I have found that breaks the cycle is Cannabis. Now finding the right strains was hard. I live in Connecticut and here our strain names are only for our state so it is hard researching what the effects different strains have. I have found that if you go to Dabbin Dad to take the CT strain name and figure out the as they call “Street” name, then you go to Leafly to see the origins of the strain and the effects. I love how it shows you a diagram of its medical effects, negative effects and emotional effects. I highly recommend checking it out.

The first strain I tried for pain actually was blue dream. I got an eighth of it from my dispensary, sent the kids to grandmas, got some dinner and munchie food and hit the bong. That day I wasn’t in a bad mood per say I was blah. After the first few hits I started to feel better almost happy then a smile and I was laughing at I have no idea. At the time I didn’t put 2 and 2 together that the cannabis was helping my mental state. That wasn’t until I ran out of weed, my mood stayed steady until there was no more. When that happen it was like a manic crash (for those of you who don’t know what that is, it is when you leave a manic state you go into a terrible depression, crying, screaming, being mad for no reason at all that is the worst).

Take today for example, I can cry at the drop of a hat all someone has to do is say something to me doesn’t have to be mean or anything for example my father in law and brother in law has horses that my husband helps out with now if you knew me you would know that I have ridden and trained horses most of my life. Horses are my passion and I love them and usually nothing keeps me away except I won’t go near these two horses because of my father in law (I will prob explain all this in another post). So today we stopped over so my husband could talk to his mom but no one was home so came over to the car (I stay in the car there another thing I will get into later) and asked if wanted to come see the horses I said no. He got an attitude and was like whatever and walked over to the horses. What he doesn’t understand is that not being able to go near those horses kills me I swear when there are horses near by its like an invisible rope that drags me to them even if I can’t pet them I could stare at them for hours. So when I’m sitting in a car 10 ft away from the paddock and you invite me when I know that no one wants me near them because I am out spoken and all I ever did to his father was try and help him with his horses.

If you want the full story check out my post on In laws….


As I explained earlier cannabis comes in different strains, here are a few of my favorite. I highly recommend blue dream here is what leafly has to say about it:

What is Blue Dream?

Blue Dream, a sativa-dominant hybrid originating in California, has achieved legendary status among West Coast strains. Crossing a Blueberry indica with the sativa Haze, Blue Dream balances full-body relaxation with gentle cerebral invigoration. Novice and veteran consumers alike enjoy the level effects of Blue Dream, which ease you gently into a calm euphoria. Some Blue Dream phenotypes express a more indica-like look and feel, but the sativa-leaning variety remains most prevalent.

With a sweet berry aroma redolent of its Blueberry parent, Blue Dream delivers swift symptom relief without heavy sedative effects. This makes Blue Dream a popular daytime medicine for patients treating pain, depression, nausea, and other ailments requiring a high THC strain.

Another favorite strain of mine is green crack:

What is Green Crack?

Don’t let the name fool you: this is pure cannabis. Few strains compare to Green Crack’s sharp energy and focus as it induces an invigorating mental buzz that keeps you going throughout the day. With a tangy, fruity flavor redolent of mango, Green Crack is a great daytime strain that may help consumers fight fatigue, stress, and depression.

Green Crack has branched into two genetic lineages, the most common of which is its sativa line descended from Skunk #1. The 75% indica variety of Green Crack is said to have come from an Afghani strain, and is marked by a tighter bud structure. Because its name perpetuates a negative image of cannabis, some people have taken to calling this strain Cush (with a ‘C’) or Green Cush instead.

One of my favorites that not only helps with my bi-polar but also my chronic pain and lack of sleep Girl Scout Cookies:

What is GSC?

GSC, formerly known as Girl Scout Cookies, is an OG Kush and Durban Poison hybridcross whose reputation grew too large to stay within the borders of its California homeland. With a sweet and earthy aroma, GSC launches you to euphoria’s top floor where full-body relaxation meets a time-bending cerebral space. A little goes a long way with this hybrid, whose THC heights have won GSC numerous Cannabis Cup awards. Patients needing a strong dose of relief, however, may look to GSC for severe pain, nausea, and appetite loss.

There are several different phenotypes of the GSC strain including Thin Mint and Platinum Cookies, which exhibit some variation in appearance and effect. Typically, however, GSC expresses its beauty in twisting green calyxes wrapped in purple leaves and fiery orange hairs. Patients and consumers looking to cultivate this cannabis staple themselves should wait 9 to 10 weeks for their indoor plants to finish flowering.

Those I would have to say are my top three. There are 3 different strains of cannabis you can get Indica, Sativa, and Hybrid. Indica aka “In da couch” is great for sleeping, relaxing, vegging, if you need to eat, this is best for bed time. Sativa is a great daytime strain, it gives you energy, elevates your mood, brings forward creativity, etc. Hybrids are just what they sound like a mix of sativa and indica, you can get different percentages like 60% sativa and 40% indica or the other way around. I like hybrids because you can have the best of both worlds. If you have any questions or opinions please leave them in the comments. If you want to see more of me…..check out my instagram and twitter (links are in contact info).

Excerpt of strain reviews taken from leafly.com

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